Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Randomize
