At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Randomize
