you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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