I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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