Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Randomize
