i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
