4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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