I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Randomize
