Swine flu is the new snow day.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
