You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
