i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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