So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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