i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
