If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
