Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize