I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
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I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
