I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
