my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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