Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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