I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
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