I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
he puts the penis in happiness.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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