He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
