I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
