is this the sara with the beer cane?
I booty called her while she was in labor.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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