Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
