Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I queefed so loud it echoed.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
this is an emotional support booty call
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Randomize