Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
