In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
