Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Randomize