lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
