I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
