is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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