So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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