found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize