i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
