yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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