Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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