let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Randomize