what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
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