Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
