How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize
