rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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