Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
