I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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