I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
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