arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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