it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
