Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize
