arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
