I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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