His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
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